A Tear From Floating, With Gravity Against Me

These past two days has been a crazy one. I just went from a really low low that I haven't felt in a while and now one of my highest highs. I feel renewed. This is odd for me to say, but I'm man enough to admit it, sometimes I just feel like a tear must be shed for myself. I used to be the biggest cry baby as a little kid, stopped for a while and then it came back to me through majority of high school. I was affected by everything good or bad. I'm not blaming anyone, but I think part of that reason was being mentored from the guy who has had the biggest positive impact on my life as of yet. He made me realize that crying to God for help isn't "unmanly", but big on your part because you are totally confided in Him. There was one day when he forced me to get some emotion out of me because I would hardly talk. I just broke down... I couldn't take anymore of the holding it in. I'm glad he was there otherwise I'm sure I would have felt alone. So with that little part of my history I shall continue to tell you about the past two days.

I was done. I was spent. Nothing could change the way I felt and I was shutting out some people that I should have done at all. It made life so hard. But wow how God just changes you and makes you open you heart more and let's you realize what is going on. I went from a crappy night to a life right now where I feel almost unstoppable. I think about things and consider others, but in the end it's up to him. He has the plan and it is set in stone. He knows our responses and actions before they occur and he knows where we will end up.

God

Wow... you amaze me
More than ever right now
I forget sometimes how great you are
and I'm in awe right now
As I know that I must begin
To take those steps closer to you
I become afraid
But in my fear I give it to you

You've captured my heart again
I get shivers and goosebumps
When you let me in on just a little bit
Of what you know
Thank you for trusting me
Thank you for giving me a chance
Thank you for your love and grace
I will live to bring you praise

Amen